You would think that, being a husband as long as I have, I would have learned the fine art of negotiating with my wife. And trust me, it is an artistic creation.
When I got married, somebody told me that marriage was a 50-50 proposition, and I, being the naïve young man that I was, believed it entirely.
The problem, I have discovered, is that 50 from a man’s point of view may not necessarily be 50 from a woman’s point of view. If I knew then what I know now, I would have asked that person to define what they meant by 50-50.
Through the years, I discovered that at times it is a 25-75 split. Other times it is a 0-100. Nobody can be 100 percent right all the time unless, of course, they are married to a husband.
When men get together, they talk about sports, hunting, cars and so forth.
When women get together, they talk about how to deal with their husbands.
I know it does not sound fair, but it is our fault as men for not getting our act together.
Although, I must admit that, at this point in my life, I do not have any regrets. The only thing that I have trouble with is the word “tomorrow.”
I am not quite sure what that word means from my wife’s perspective. From my perspective, the word “tomorrow” is just a way of putting something off and possibly not even doing it.
I never really thought anything of it until recently. To me the word “tomorrow” was just a casual word I used to postpone things. It was not until last week that it really came to the forefront.
The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage asked me to do something for her. I was really busy at the time, I’m not sure what I was busy doing, but I was not paying too much attention. I smiled at her and said, “Okay.” Then, I went back to doing whatever I was doing.
The next day she approached me and said, “Did you do what I asked you to do yesterday?”
I really was not quite up to date on what she asked me to do yesterday, but I said, “No, but I’ll do it tomorrow.” To be fair, I actually forgot about it. I did not mean to forget about it, but it does not change the fact that I forgot about it.
The next day she queried me rather sternly, “Did you do what I asked you to do the other day?”
At this point I was marinating in that husband fog that seems to plague every husband and so I said, “No, but I’ll do it first thing tomorrow for sure.”
If I thought that was the end of the conversation, I was thinking in vain.
“Today,” she said as sternly as I have ever heard her speak, “is the tomorrow you promise to do it.”
To read the entire Out to Pastor column by Dr. James L. Snyder, see the Feb.23 edition of The Central Virginian.